Before wedding plans begin, both the groom and bride have to arrange for a meeting for parents from both sides to make decisions on the selection of the wedding date and the amount of dowry to be paid. They called it a ceremony of guo da li. The groom will pay the dowry and the money has to be exchanged before the date of the wedding. This meeting will help in establishing the kind of Chinese wedding Kuala Lumpur traditions to follow.
The night prior to the wedding
According to tradition, the groom and bride will not stay together before the wedding. They will go back to parents or stay with friends and relatives at the hotel.
The Chinese wedding etiquette that takes place on the day prior to the wedding may include combing the hair. The other tradition is to have a woman with the good fortune to set the bride on the previous day. Eating tong yuen the previous night serves the purpose of signifying a new start for a complete, new family.
The wedding day
On the day of the wedding, the groom and his group of male friends will travel to the home of the bride to pick her. Before the groom gets the bride, he and the whole team will have to undertake Chinese door games brought by the bride’s team. In the current society, wedding games at the door that very hard translate into the groom treasuring the bride. The other tradition is that the man will give the ladies a lai to enter into the house after the games are over. The money is made up by number nine and the more the numbers the better. Number nine sounds like long lasting in Chinese.
The groom purchases the Chinese wedding dress from the Chinese wedding shop. Normally, Chinese peoples will call the Chinese wedding dress as a traditional costume – qun kwa. After these games, the groom and bride will have a tea party with the family of the bride. They will kneel before the elders and serve them tea to address them by their titles proceeding with old to young family members. The groom and bride will the then get red envelopes with money and gifts bought from the bridal shop in KL.
It is advisable for the bride to get dressed in the red Kai Po bought from the Chinese wedding accessories shop in Kuala Lumpur. This was during the tea company but today the bride uses a white wedding dress since it is used to fit the wedding ceremony during the day.
Just after the ceremony, the bride and groom will move on to the next venue where the ceremony is taking place. The bride leaves the house under the umbrella, which is also a tradition in China meant to provide protection against evil spirits. She will also hand lai see to younger relatives that are still single. It is customary to give it to anybody that has been of help in the wedding, from best men and bridesmaids to the chauffeur and hairdresser.
Today there is no sufficient time in the schedule of the wedding to get to the house of the groom for a tea ceremony; therefore, many people to have it at Guo da li Malaysia and restaurants. this gets done before the start of the banquet. The ceremony is similar to the one at the house of the bride and she has to change into the kai po for the ceremony.